I'm standing still, alone on the black top of an empty street. A single lamp overhead casts a sepia tone through the dense fog settling in around me. My eyes look slowly from side to side as I try to make sense of the quiet, peaceful calm I feel despite the horrific awareness that my child has died. The surreal feelings remain as I roll over and spoon his little body next to me in bed, relieved … [Read more...] about The Offers
doose syndrome
The Best Luck
"Good luck," were his parting words. "This will be the rest of your life," said the neurologist who performed our second opinion, offering the grim diagnosis of Doose Syndrome. I had no reason not to believe him. I'd already googled the hell out of "drop attacks" and knew. "But what about this video?" I naively countered, hoping he might watch it with me and get excited too. But he firmly shook … [Read more...] about The Best Luck
Where To Find Pediatric Cannabis Support
"Diane, please note: Mother gives 7-year-old male patient THC oil to treat his seizure disorder." I'd never seen a doctor speak into a tape recorder before, but then I'd never seen this doctor. I fully expected Peggy Lipton to appear with her wide smile to offer me a damn fine cup of coffee and a slice of cherry pie. Trying not to roll my eyes, I corrected the new doctor who was covering for our … [Read more...] about Where To Find Pediatric Cannabis Support
Solid Gold: Tips From Dr. Bonni
The most commonly searched terms that get parents here are: "CBD", "Kids" and "Dosing". They're asking the internet because doctors certainly aren't telling them. Except as a social worker, I ethically can't tell you either. What I can do, however, is empower you with the tools and resources you need to figure it out yourself. I promise, once you get the hang of it, you will feel even stronger and … [Read more...] about Solid Gold: Tips From Dr. Bonni
And She Was
"¿No estoy yo aquí que soy tu madre?" I hadn't expected the drumming. I felt the pounding in my chest before I smelled the copal. Smoke billowed up from the plaza filled with tens of thousands of pilgrims. Dancing, crying, nursing mothers everywhere . . . images of la Virgen were everywhere . . . large statues, faded prints and homemade altars tied on backs, strapped to wheelchairs and s … [Read more...] about And She Was
Mythic Mothering In The Upside Down
"Wherefore, the days will come that no flesh shall be safe upon the waters. . . . and the destroyer rideth upon the face thereof.” D&C 61:15-19 When my 3 year-old son became obsessed with The Nightmare Before Christmas I tried not to be concerned. Sure, it’s a kids movie but I don’t know . . . He was just so little and scary movies have never been my thing. I was raised a member of the C … [Read more...] about Mythic Mothering In The Upside Down
Status Update
I was suppose to be there to pick him up at 2 o'clock. Except the entire day was setting me up. A $13.47 errand took me to 3 different shops across town. When I got the call from the school at 10 past, I was certain it was just to reassure my son that I was on my way. Instead, it was that call. The worst call. "An 8 1/2 minute seizure on the playground at recess. The ambulance is on their way. He … [Read more...] about Status Update
“Happy” Epilepsy Awareness Month
November is Epilepsy Awareness Month and I apologize for not posting earlier. I really tried but found myself bored while reviewing the usual. All stuff we need to share, I'm sure, but I just wasn't feeling any of it. Struggling with my motivation and finding a topic to create awareness around, I sat down to write and decided to simply start where I'm at. Checking in I noticed I'm really, … [Read more...] about “Happy” Epilepsy Awareness Month
Looking for it
"You're looking for certainty," my son's neurologist reflected. I lowered by chin and raised my eyebrows with pursed lips. I've been Buddhish for over 20 years and work in the field of death and dying. I'm pretty sure I don't believe in certainty. And certainly not when it comes to epilepsy treatment. I saw this post on brilliant Elizabeth's blog a couple days after this appointment and made … [Read more...] about Looking for it
Antecdotal Epidiolex
When Senator Gillebrand mentioned in The Senate Caucus on International Narcotics Control hearing about the current state of cannabis research being primarily in the hands of one pharmaceutical company, she was talking about GW Pharmaceutical. They've been working on marijuana based medicines in top "secret locations" at least since the mid nineties. Their highly anticipated CBD pharmaceutical … [Read more...] about Antecdotal Epidiolex
